This page is dedicated and designed specifically for
fathers who have experienced a loss right along side us angel mothers.
Men Grieve Too: First official Interview, Father-
Ron Clair husband to Moms of Outreach Founder Lindsey Clair; Februrary 24th, 2010.
Moms of Angels Outreach: When you lost your precious
son what were the very first thoughts going through your head?
Ron: I felt helpless and crushed. I knew I would never be able to do the things with my son
like my dad did with me."
Moms of Angels Outreach: What happened after you got home from the hospital?
Ron: I knew I had to take care of my wife since she was in a very fragile state. I had to be the
strong one since the house would have fallen to pieces and I had to father our then 2 year old daughter, my wife was not herself
and couldn't be a mom in those hard days especially when reality set in.
Moms of Angels Outreach: Were people such as friends and family supportive?
Ron: I can honestly say yes our family and certain friends were there for us but sometimes their
words did not help since they possibly couldn't have understood what we were going through. I remember one day
when we finally went back to church so many people came up to my wife and asked how she was doing but would totally overlook
me. A couple people even had the audacity to say "Oh I know you're fine Ron, your the man and have to be strong and
after all you didn't carry the baby she did." That pierced like a dagger in my heart. How could anyone ever think
that the fathers don't hurt as much as the mother? Yes, it's true we didn't experience the physical part of it all but
the emotions are just as strong. If I could have carried all that for my wife I would have.
Moms of Angels Outreach: That is so terrible and the truth. A father's grief is often kicked to
the curb so to speak. How did you grieve, did you ever get a chance to? Sounds like you had to hold it in a lot
of times?
Ron: I would have my breakdowns in the shower, in my office at work where fortunately I was alone
to do so, in my car etc., I tried not to cry in front of my wife since I did not want to make it worse for her. I learned
later that she needed me to because she felt like I didn't care, she also thought I just didn't grieve and it didn't affect
me at all. This is where I learned men and women grieve very differently and my wife learned this along the way as well.
Moms of Angels Outreach: Thank you so much for sharing with us. My hope is that that
this interview can reach fathers who are searching for healing during their time of grief.
Ron: Thanks for having me and for all the grieving father's out there, you are not alone!
If you are a father struggling with
your grief, and would like to get in contact with Ron, please e-mail me directly Lindsey@momsofangels.org and I will set that up for you.
God bless all the daddies!
